Sir Write A Lot

Washed Sight

2024-04-29T00:00:00+00:00

"Where are they? Where are they? WHERE ARE THEY?" Mansi said panicking around the house looking for her glasses. It had been three days since they abandoned her. Every day, she would wake up, put them on and get on with her day. Her glasses were not just an item she used, they were her partner in crime, always by her side, seeing what she was seeing. They weren't prescription glasses but without them, she felt exposed.

"We can get you a new pair," her husband said nonchalantly. That annoyed her even more. Does he not care about anything? What does he know about the depth of long-term relationships? Mansi bemused about her partner of over ten years.

"No. I want those pairs. I know they are here somewhere. I haven't taken them out of the apartment." Mansi said turning over the pile of dirty clothes for the tenth time.

"While you're at it, why not take a look at your clean clothes as well," Mansi's husband jested.

"Huh. Maybe I will," Mansi said annoyed by her husband's lack of concern and then went to the washing machine just to spite him. She took the clothes out to put them in the dryer and the glasses fell out on the ground. She looked at them, shock in her eyes.

She picked the glasses. They were intact and just a bit moist due to the time they spent in the machine. She smiled at finally having found the glasses.

"FOUND THEM!" She told her husband triumphantly.

"WHERE?" He asked from the other room.

"In the washing machine," Mansi said in an almost whisper.

"Huh!" Her husband said coming out to see it for himself. He saw Mansi standing with glasses in one hand and clothes in another.

"Don't you dare laugh," Mansi said as she saw his face turning into a grin.

Nightingale

2024-04-22T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi hit her head with a stick.

"Ouch! Damn!" She screamed with pain.

"Why won't you get out?" Mansi said with annoyance woven in each word. She kept pacing in her room holding her head in her hands and rubbing the spot where she had hit herself.

"Damn this song. Why can't it leave me alone?" Mansi said again as the song went on a loop in her mind.

"What should I do? What should I do?"

Mansi repeated along with the song.

"I wish there was some way I could give this problem to someone else," Mansi said and suddenly an idea popped in her head. Her eyes lit up. She picked her phone and opened the recording app.

And she started to sing. In a perfect pitch, with her soul in it, she recorded the song.

"Not the best quality but it should do," Mansi said listening to her rendition of the song. She shared the song with her friend.

'In love with this sing. So decided to sing it myself 😝'
'After quite long'

Soon enough, a reply came.

'Wow!' and felt a huge weight lifted off her mind.

A couple of days later she got another message from her friend.

'Listening to your version of the song on loop. It's stuck in my head now. :('

She had almost forgotten the song now. She had successfully transferred the earworm to someone else.

Mansi smiled.

Wedding Wobbles

2024-04-15T00:00:00+00:00

"I don't want to get married."

Mansi's friends had heard these words a hundred times. Whenever she would watch a movie with a wedding scene, she would utter these words; whenever any of her friend would get married, she would utter these words; whenever the word 'marriage' would be uttered, she would utter these words. Her friends had heard these words so often that many had stopped registering them in the conversations anymore.

Yet, everyone was dumbstruck when they heard these words today. Her friends looked at each with a somber face which quickly turned to a shy and controlled grin. They looked at Mansi whose face was puffed, her makeup further radiated by the glow of her anger. Her bangles were shimmering and clunking as she flayed her hands wildly while the eyes turned more and more menacing.

"I don't want to get married," she said once more, her voice echoing in the hallway.

Her family looked at her worried. One of her friends dry-swallowed, came closer to Mansi and then with a soft and almost trembling voice whispered.

"But Mansi, you are already married. You just got married," he said pointing at her bridal dress and makeup.

"So what?" Mansi huffed and sat down on a chair.

"I still don't want to get married."

Unimaginable Discomfort

2024-04-08T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi froze with fear. His claws were all around her. The fingers bristled her hair and each strand shivered with anxiety. She hoped that someone would protect her and stop him but in this moment, she was alone. Her eyes kept getting wider and she chided herself for the words that had led to this, the words she had uttered in complete nonchalance.

He was about to engulf her in his forced embrace, removing every trace of her identity, in the same way as darkness engulfs any sense of humaneness in the society. Mansi prepared for oblivion in her mind. His limbs stretched and then he paused. Something flashed in his mind. Mansi could see his brain processing like a computer, doing data analysis of some sort. "Was he even human?" Mansi thought with her breath stuck in her lungs and her voice in her throat.

Something clicked in his mind and suddenly, his limbs were moving towards Mansi's cheeks. The claws scraped the skin and moved around the face slowly. Mansi could feel the cold nails but her body had betrayed her and remained motionless.

It went on for eternity in Mansi's mind before he moved away his claws. Instead of removing her identity, he decided to forever etch his identity on hers.

Friend Conundrum

2024-04-01T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi slapped him harder than she had intended.

"I'm sorry," she said as he rubbed his cheek.

"Why did you hit me?" He asked.

"Why are you this weak?" She replied.

"I'm not weak." He mumbled.

"Yeah, right. I slapped you a little and you crumpled like a pack of cards hit by a crazy cat."

"That's vivid. I guess you are getting your Instagram cat fix," he said grinning.

"Not by choice. I'm being sent cat pics to see."

"Ahh. She?"

"Yes, she. And don't talk about her like you know her," Mansi said with a stern look on her face.

"Don't I?"

"No. She's my friend and not yours."

"Okay. But I won't mind knowing her," he said and winked at Mansi. Mansi fumed. Before she knew, her finger was pointing towards him.

"Stay away from her."

"What if she doesn't want to stay away from me," he said with a twinkle in his eyes and a smirk.

Mansi looked at him and knew he was joking. His left hand was still rubbing his cheek. Mansi knew what she had to do and slammed her fist in his stomach.

"Ouch! What was that for?"

"The slap was clearly not enough," Mansi said and grinned.

Learn to Talk

2024-03-25T00:00:00+00:00

"What is the meaning of this?" Mansi said clenching her fists. Her curly hair were unkempt and her eyes had fire and wilderness in them.

"What?" Jirah looked at her bemused. He had become used to her antics and half the time, he didn't hear half of her rants. This time, he was only listening because there were people around and she was on the verge of shouting. Typical of Mansi - create a scene.

"You think it's okay to say that I'm looking like a prostitute."

"A high-class prostitute," said Jirah and winked.

"How dare you?"

"I am saying what I think," said Jirah.

"I was just saying it as a joke."

"Would you say something like this to your mother as a joke?"

"How dare you say something like this about my mother? Learn to talk about elders."

"You learn to talk about women," said Mansi.

Pay Me Not!

2024-03-18T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi decided that life isn't worth living. She had shouted, screamed and cried but nothing could change the inevitable. She hadn't slept properly for days and she had even forgotten all her relationships because of this and yet, she hadn't found success.

"We are working on it." She heard every time she called Airbnb customer care.

"Let me tell you what the issue is," Mansi started telling the customer care person what the bug in their system was and how they can fix it. The customer care respondent - definitely not a coder - listened patiently while checking her canned response number 53 and repeated it with utmost courtesy.

"Urgghhh. Listen, you..." Mansi started but before she could continue, the phone was snatched from her.

"You shouldn't talk like this with them."

"Can you believe them? I'm trying to pay them to book the rooms. I literally want to pay them money and they aren't ready to take it. Morons!" Mansi roared.

"Don't worry. It's a corporation. They will find a way to take our money."

"Yeah. Let's hope we aren't sleeping on the streets when we reach Rome," Mansi said and tried to pay through the website again.

Elevator Escalation

2024-03-11T00:00:00+00:00

"Defender is the worst product ever," Mansi said chomping down on her eggs.

"What?" She asked looking at the stunned faces in front of her.

"Nothing. I was just saying that he worked in Defender before." Mansi's colleague said pointing towards his left. The person on the left had his hand frozen trying his best to smile.

"Oh, I didn't mean it that way. Windows defender is still better than Update software," Mansi said in full damage control.

"I worked in Update after Defender," he said finally chewing up his food. The color drained from Mansi's face and the whole table roared with laughter.

"I hate this," Mansi said to her friend as they entered the elevator.

"Hate what? Saying wrong things at the wrong time." Her friend said laughing.

"Yes."

"It's okay. Now, focus on the project."

"Thanks for reminding about that," Mansi seethed.

"You are welcome. Why the long face?" The friend said amused.

"You know why? I hate Neha."

On cue, the door opened and in front of Mansi stood Neha. Neha went inside the elevator as Mansi came out.

"Why does this happen to me? I hate this." Mansi wailed.

Murder at First Sight

2024-03-04T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi decided that she would kill him. Not because he threw water on her precious clothes; not because he teased to date her sister; and definitely not because he was cute. She decided that the only way everyone in the office would stop teasing her about him was if he didn't exist. "I know it's not the right thing but what choice do I have?" Mansi thought and mixed the juice with a little alcohol.

"It would have been easier if he was a drunkard. But this is the best poison in the world either ways," said Mansi giggling. She had checked online and it takes a little more than a shot worth of methyl alcohol to kill someone. Mansi knew that he wouldn't drink that much alcohol in one go - the non-drinker he was - but the night was young and she had time on her hand.

"Here's your juice," said Mansi and brought him his favorite orange juice.

"Oh! Wow, Mansi. I never thought you would bring me water, let alone juice," he said with a grin.

"I was already taking something for myself so..." Mansi trailed off waiting for him to sip.

"It's tasting funny. I think it's gone bad," he said and kept the juice down.

"Oh no!" said Mansi, truly disappointed. He looked at her face and grinned again, "but you have brought me the drink so I'll finish this one even if it's sour."

In one large swig, he finished off the drink and smacked his lips. "You happy Mansi."

Mansi nodded. “A couple more of such drinks and my work is done," she thought, her mind sparkling with happiness.

As the party continued, Mansi found new and creative ways to smuggle in the methyl alcohol in his drinks and food. It was almost three hours since the first glass of juice was taken by him when he coughed.

"I don't know why, but I feel dizzy. What was in the food man?" He said in a voice that was quickly deteriorating. He grabbed the chair and tried to sit on it but fell beside it. A person shouted for some water while another one held him. Mansi showed concern but was giddy inside.

'Finally!' her mind repeated as he started coughing blood.

"Mansi. I don't know what is happening but I must tell you. I'm sorry if I ever hurt you. You're the most wonderful person I've ever met," he said waving his hands. His vision had become blurry and he could barely see two feet in front of him.

Mansi held his hand and spoke softly, "I know. I was not offended. It was all fine."

By the time the ambulance arrived, his body had given up. Mansi knew what the autopsy would say and hoped that there was no murder investigation. Her choice of poison was mundane specifically for this reason.

'Now, I will finally be rid of all the teasing,' she thought as his body was taken away.

Rotten Parched Lips

2024-02-26T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi touched her lips and was annoyed.

"Damn these rotten parched lips." She said and reached for her lip balm. As usual, it was just out of her reach. She stretched her arm and before she could balance her feet on the ground, the wheels of the chairs moved backwards and she was flying towards the ground.

She saved her face by placing her hand on the ground and heard a crunching sound.

"Ouch!" Mansi said and checked her wrist. It had survived but was hurting.

The lip balm was also on the ground, now finally in her reach. She picked it and smeared them on her lips.

"Mansi! Why are you putting lipstick while lying on the ground? Some new style." A guy said laughing. A few others joined him as Mansi got up. She smiled at others and turned back to her desk.

"Damn these rotten parched lips."

Disease Extrapolation

2024-02-19T00:00:00+00:00

"I think I have throat cancer," said Mansi in a somber whisper.

"What?" Her friend asked choking on his innocent sip of water. You don't have the watercooler talk to discuss matters of life or death. Mansi nodded, her expression fixed and her eyes shifty. Worry was visible on her face and was now mirrored on his.

"How?"

"You know I've been coughing for the past week. During my travel, I fell completely off the wagon. Tried the allergy medication because earlier the diagnosis was that - no effect. In fact, I started having the fever as well. For the past 5 days, I have been doing a course of anti-biotics - no effect again. Everything points to one thing now," said Mansi and gulped down the whole glass of water in one go, as if drowning her miseries in it.

Her friend looked like a deer in front of headlights. He opened his mouth and then closed it.

"Are the doctors completely sure? You should take a second opinion," is all he could come up with.

"I haven't yet gone to the doctor."

"Huh!"

"Yeah. I didn't have the time and I was too tired."

He let out a sigh of relief. "You have been self-diagnosing yourself."

Mansi nodded, still a serious expression on her face.

"Go see a doctor. It will probably be viral or something."

"But it isn't going away."

"It will in a few days." He said annoyed.

"You don't think it's throat cancer?"

"If you want it to be throat cancer, start using more tobacco."

Mansi stuck her tongue out at him. "Don't make fun of me."

"Don't self-diagnose and go see a doctor."

"It could be dengue as well - I'm having fever. Plus, dengue is in the air these days."

"It's not dengue. You don't have that high a fever. Plus, with dengue, you would have been in bed by now."

"Hmm... Good to know that. Then, it probably is typhoid. I've had typhoid before you know - twice."

He had a strong urge to face-palm himself but resisted.

"Ok. It might be typhoid. Just get it checked by a doctor before taking any medicine."

"Yeah. I will get myself checked for Typhoid." Mansi said giddily.

Pen or Sword

2024-02-12T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi picked up a pen and used it like a sword. Not defying governments or changing the world order by writing the next masterpiece. She literally picked the pen and stabbed him with it. Her intention was clear. His leg should be the canvas for her.

"Are you done?" He drawled and continued watching the movie. Then pen had failed her. She looked at the pen incredulously. She turned to her own hand and saw that the pen was working perfectly. Invigorated, she attacked him again and the pen ditched her again.

"What the hell?" She said and looked at the pen tip.

"It's my pen. It will show some reverence to me." He said laughing.

Mansi looked at him with pure fury and then without any control she also started laughing. She took the pen and started writing on a pad. When she was convinced that the pen would work no matter what, she turned to his leg - which had not changed it's position.

The first mark went blank. However, Mansi was patient this time. Instead of a sword, the pen turned into a needle. Slowly but with gaining confidence, she spilled the ink little by little on his leg. By the time he turned to look, it had turned into an artwork - grotesque - but an art nonetheless.

"What the hell?" He said looking at the random crisscross of lines on his leg.

"I win." Mansi said triumphantly.

"You know it's just a pen stain and will wash out in the first bath." He said with a quizzical look on his face.

Mansi looked at him and stuck her tongue out, "I win," and threw the pen at him.

Prioritization Paradox

2024-02-05T00:00:00+00:00

Mansi wept!

She wanted to take a knife and slash at her computer. The stupid machine had decided that it was more important to restart right now than let her work. She called the machine names which would have brightened her mother's ears and then cursed the company that made the operating system. All in her head as she worked for the company.

She had to run the script before 5:30 pm, otherwise, she won't be able to go home till 7 pm. That was how the company's cabs worked. And she shuddered at the thought of booking a taxi and explaining the path to driver. "Damn you!" she said to the machine as a dot continued moving indicating the progress.

Mansi checked her watch - it was 5:10 pm right now and it would take the script around 10 minutes to run. She had ten minutes before giving in to despair. She went to get a glass of water - 9 min left; she chatted with her colleague nearby - 7 min left; she played a quick game on her phone - 3 min left. Her heart rate picked up as she looked at the watch. And then - her computer was back to life.

"Yes," she shouted and opened the software. It was blank. Her file was conspicuously absent.

"Where did you go?" Mansi shouted and went to the folder where the file was saved.

The folder was not there.

"It's wiped clean," whispered Mansi, all sense of time forgotten. She sat there stunned for one whole minute before the corner of her mouth twitched. Before she knew it, she was laughing and packing her bags.

"What happened Mansi?" The guy sitting next to her asked.

"I just realized how quickly something loses its priority if it ceases to exist," said Mansi and ran for the cab. She had one minute and it was the most important thing to her now.